Srila Prabhupada’s Disappearance

By Anantacarya dasa

This document is a report of some of the details that occurred during the last five days of Srila Prabhupada's presence with us in Vrndavan, India. It is a diary which was written everyday in Vrndavan at that time. It herewith is delivered as it was written down 38 years ago in l977, with no additions. 11 November l977. I arrive at the Mandir (from California) at about 9:30 A. M. As soon as possible I enter Srila Prabhupada's room. He is lying on his back in his King-Sized bed, being massaged gently by his close associates. There is a kirtan in progress. Srila Prabhupada is incredibly thin, and his hands and feet are swollen. His limbs are supported by pillows. There is a discussion in progress between Srila Prabhupada and his close disciples. Srila Prabhupada has expressed his wish to go on parikram to Govardan Hill. Upon being asked if he will ride in a minibus, his answer is "Bullock Cart". (This discussion is being recorded and is on tape, I believe). Tamal Krishna is writing down on a pad what Srila Prabhupada's desires are. Srila Prabhupada is so weak that the only parts of his body that he is moving are the lower parts of his arms, and then only barely. He at most pushes against a cover slightly or raises a hand as a signal. If he wants to move a leg even slightly, he asks someone to do it for him. It just does not seem possible for a person to be so emaciated, but there He is, our Spiritual Master, in His transcendental body---that looks thinner than people who have been living under near starvation conditions. And in this unbelievably weakened condition he is proposing to go down the road 20 miles in a bullock cart. What to speak of then circumnambulating the hill, staying overnight, and then coming back the next day! Even in this unbelievable bodily condition, He remains our intrepid and enthusiatic devotionally courageous Spiritual Leader. He certainly isn't going to let any kind of bodily condition stop him from going to Govardhan Hill for Govardhan Puja. We, of course, are all worried, but start making plans for the parikram.

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